Well, as you know friends, my habits are nasty
When I see a rabbit I think: “Rabbits are tasty”
Besides, I am a sadist, and I dig on sarcasm
I might not visit you when you get a back spasm
I love to make those hideous sounds when I sneeze
And if someone clicks my photo I refuse to say cheese
And I love to sing lovely songs – loud and out of tune
And to all the insults hurled at me I’m totally immune
When I see a pretty child I can't help but think of his alluring mom
I love Harry S. Truman dearly for dropping that magnificent Bomb
All those crimes against humanity seem so very nice
They enthuse me like nothing, to life they add spice
And I’m trying to make this poem(!) as pathetic as I can
On reading this you’ll waste your time – and such is my plan
God has a moron-filter, but somehow I managed to get through
And now I’m on a mission – well, I’ve got so much to do!
The basic action plan of mine is to irritate you like hell
Now isn’t that something, buddies? Isn’t that really swell?
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